Highs and Lows

I've written about this in previous posts, so excuse my repetition, but I'm constantly reminded that life is filled with the highs and lows and they are often existing in the same moment. I wish this weren't true, but I seem to find myself most drawn to writing when life is at its low moments. I want that to change however, so I'm going to include the good things that are also happening alongside the lows I've experienced lately. Life is better balanced anyway...right?

I recently started seeing someone through Kaiser to help with depression care and while we've only met once, I already feel extremely hopeful and encouraged. She's not a therapist but she helps patients set goals and try to keep life going when we feel as though life has slowed down due to depression and lack of motivation. It's pretty close to what I was looking for last year when I saw a therapist through Soul Restoration project out in Orange County. The best part is that it's free so it's not adding an additional financial burden to seek help!

The timing couldn't have been more perfect because I've found myself spiraling down back into familiar depression stages. I've struggled sleeping through the night, fallen back on bad eating habits, and lost motivation to care not only for my own life but for others. Unfortunately, it's a vicious cycle because the less I care about eating well the deeper I fall in feeling depressed and round and around we go. I'm so thankful that I began seeing her last week and thankful that it'll be a more extended time seeing her every other week for a few months.

I started an actual adult budget with the help of a family friend and it's been the perfect mixture of happiness and pain. It's painful to track where you spend money when you aren't used to the details of your day. However, it's also empowering to know where you spend money and have the ability to determine what takes priority in your life. I'm not too far into debt but I definitely need to pay off some credit cards and pay back some generous friends so that I can get my life in order.

That's it for this short and sweet little update. I'm hoping to work on another post for the beginning of February dreams for the future!

Once again, thanks for reading these updates and for sticking with me through all the highs and (mainly) lows that I tend to share. I'm so thankful for each and every eye that gives this little piece of my heart some time and attention.