Happy New Year 2016!
I hope that you got to celebrate and bring in the new year yesterday with joy and hope for what 2016 has in store! For this post, I wanted to share what I'm looking forward to and what I'm hoping to focus on in the new year. The biggest focus will be on family. This means all the types of family that exist in my life: My immediate family. My small group. My boyfriend. My church...the list goes on.
The past month or so has really opened my eyes to how important family is to enjoy a rich life filled with love. I've seen some real ugliness in families and how hurtful those relationships can be to a person, but I have also seen family step up and support someone who is hurting and feeling alone. I want to continue to see the beautiful things family can add to my life and focus on those positives rather than dwell on past hurts.
I want to continue to share life with my small group and my church. I've been pretty absent in my church the last half of 2015 and I've really missed those Sunday mornings spending time with God, singing, praying, and being with my church family. Thankfully I have been able to regularly attend my small group and that has been so wonderful. I led my first study this Fall and for the first time, enjoyed the process of preparing the study and digging deep in the text. I'm looking forward to leading again this Spring.
I have enjoyed 7 months with my boyfriend and I'm so excited for what this new year has in store for us. He continues to challenge me to be better and stronger and I hope to continue to do the same for him. We aim to build one another up and support one another when things get hard. We have both learned a lot through the hardships the past month has brought and I'm so thankful that it's only brought us closer. I've seen him at his lowest and he's seen me at mine, and we've both been able to navigate the unknown with love and patience with one another. 2016 could be a really big year for us and I'm excited to see what God has in store!
And lastly, my immediate family. I can't say enough good things about them. They bring so much joy, laughter, and love to my life. While my family is changing, we remain close and I only hope that continues in 2016. I've gotten the chance to see my family in a different way this past year and how they love me so unconditionally even when I mess up. Their love is what helps me understand God's love for us and how it's never ending. I hope to continue to love them well and grow closer as a family. They got me through my deepest depression 2 years ago...without them I don't know where I would be. I'm looking forward to supporting them and what new adventures we go on as a family in the new year!
I wanted to end by saying this: Be good to those you call family. I know we all have our own baggage either with our blood family or the family we've been able to create through friendships, etc. But in a world so broken and hurting, I hope that each of you reading this can hold tight to those you love and cherish the time you have together. Don't let ugliness tear you apart. Life is much too short and entirely too precious to waste on hate & bitterness. Here's to healthy families in 2016 and a year filled with love and healing for us all.
Cheers.
Friday, January 1, 2016
Friday, December 4, 2015
Fear & Response
There have been a few events in the past two years that I have felt genuine fear over. First was Ebola and [what I thought at the time was a] threat of widespread outbreak. I read every article I could get my hands on, began following the CDC for updates, and learned as much as I could about the spread and contamination of the disease because I was genuinely afraid. I felt the only way to calm my fear was to get the facts and not just be scared with no education on the subject. Add to this the fact that I see WAY too many "end-of-the-world" movies and you can see why fear took over all my responses. Thankfully I did educate myself and learned what the reality of Ebola looked like for me (an American with a strong healthcare system) versus the African countries that still struggle with Ebola cases and education on how it spreads. In those months that I was so afraid, I learned how fear can truly overwhelm and influence my response to the world around me.
Recently I have found myself fearful again, but in a different way than before. I'm not afraid for my life, but the general threat of terrorism around the world. I actually saw a post on Facebook that said to instead call the group known mainly as ISIS, Daesh because ISIS implies a nation and they have no national identity. [That is how I will refer to the group going forward]. Hearing my pastor talk about persecution in the church is one thing, especially when it took place in the beginning of the church. It's entirely different when it's happening now as I live and write these words. Christians are being killed today in numbers that we haven't seen since the formation of the church. Muslims are being killed too. All innocent lives taken simply because they refuse to follow the extreme theology of hate that the Daesh spews.
And I find myself weeping for those who have died, in a way that I have not experienced within my soul until now. I cannot help but see the similarities in today's persecution compared to those of Stephen and other martyrs that followed. Killed because they claimed Christ as their Lord and Savior. And because of the similarities, I fear for the world that continues to reject Jesus and others who pretend to teach the Gospel but instead spread intolerance, hate and hardened hearts filled with judgement. Last I checked, these were not included in the teachings of Jesus. In fact, the Jesus I read about in the Bible is the exact opposite in how he treats people.
I was inspired to write this post after reading an article in Relevant Magazine titled "What Can Be Done About ISIS?" (link in the title). I do not want to be compliant in the face of such hatred. I have found myself praying more, and actually desiring to pray for the victims, the refugees... and surprisingly the terrorists. This article interestingly reminds us that Paul [Saul at the time] was in fact a terrorist against Christians when he met God on the road (to Syria no less) and instead became a preacher of God's word. It's extremely difficult for me to grasp what my prayers would look like if I were to pray for the terrorists and for their hearts to be turned towards Jesus but I get chills just thinking about it. How amazing would it be to hear that they put down their weapons and plots for murder and instead followed Jesus and gave to the poor and loved people as God's children?? God has done it before, God can do it again. Lord help my unbelief!
One of the headlines in the article reads, "Reject Fear and Raise Our Voices" and that's what I'm trying to begin here. I want to encourage us to pray, to hope for change and work together to unite the world against this group that only wishes for us to divide. We can fight fear with prayer; hate with love.
In another post from Relevant Magazine I saw the clip (below) of Stephen Colbert discussing the refugees acceptance into our country. I didn't always enjoy the Colbert Report but this is a Stephen that I can get behind. His words here are powerful and I wanted to share them with you now. Some had mentioned the idea of giving those seeking safety a "Christian Test" to see if they are Christian or not. I find that my response is the same as Stephen's: If they can finish the sentence (directly from Scripture) then that might be the better "test" of who is or who isn't a Christian:
Recently I have found myself fearful again, but in a different way than before. I'm not afraid for my life, but the general threat of terrorism around the world. I actually saw a post on Facebook that said to instead call the group known mainly as ISIS, Daesh because ISIS implies a nation and they have no national identity. [That is how I will refer to the group going forward]. Hearing my pastor talk about persecution in the church is one thing, especially when it took place in the beginning of the church. It's entirely different when it's happening now as I live and write these words. Christians are being killed today in numbers that we haven't seen since the formation of the church. Muslims are being killed too. All innocent lives taken simply because they refuse to follow the extreme theology of hate that the Daesh spews.
And I find myself weeping for those who have died, in a way that I have not experienced within my soul until now. I cannot help but see the similarities in today's persecution compared to those of Stephen and other martyrs that followed. Killed because they claimed Christ as their Lord and Savior. And because of the similarities, I fear for the world that continues to reject Jesus and others who pretend to teach the Gospel but instead spread intolerance, hate and hardened hearts filled with judgement. Last I checked, these were not included in the teachings of Jesus. In fact, the Jesus I read about in the Bible is the exact opposite in how he treats people.
I was inspired to write this post after reading an article in Relevant Magazine titled "What Can Be Done About ISIS?" (link in the title). I do not want to be compliant in the face of such hatred. I have found myself praying more, and actually desiring to pray for the victims, the refugees... and surprisingly the terrorists. This article interestingly reminds us that Paul [Saul at the time] was in fact a terrorist against Christians when he met God on the road (to Syria no less) and instead became a preacher of God's word. It's extremely difficult for me to grasp what my prayers would look like if I were to pray for the terrorists and for their hearts to be turned towards Jesus but I get chills just thinking about it. How amazing would it be to hear that they put down their weapons and plots for murder and instead followed Jesus and gave to the poor and loved people as God's children?? God has done it before, God can do it again. Lord help my unbelief!
One of the headlines in the article reads, "Reject Fear and Raise Our Voices" and that's what I'm trying to begin here. I want to encourage us to pray, to hope for change and work together to unite the world against this group that only wishes for us to divide. We can fight fear with prayer; hate with love.
In another post from Relevant Magazine I saw the clip (below) of Stephen Colbert discussing the refugees acceptance into our country. I didn't always enjoy the Colbert Report but this is a Stephen that I can get behind. His words here are powerful and I wanted to share them with you now. Some had mentioned the idea of giving those seeking safety a "Christian Test" to see if they are Christian or not. I find that my response is the same as Stephen's: If they can finish the sentence (directly from Scripture) then that might be the better "test" of who is or who isn't a Christian:
Our response to welcoming people to our country is yet another way of reacting in fear rather than love. I understand this is a complicated matter and I do not mean to make it sound in anyway, easy. I would like the people in the public eye who proclaim Christianity as their belief to actually live as a follower of Christ and stop embarrassing the rest of us. I won't list each and every verse here, but this article from Relevant gives great scripture resources as well as discusses our response to foreigners and how the Bible teaches us to treat those among us: What the Bible Says about How to Treat Refugees.
Love will always be louder.
[Update: Since I first wrote this, the shooting in San Bernardino has occurred.] I don't have any additional comments to add to that particular discussion, but I didn't want to post this in light of those events and the information coming out of that investigation, without at least mentioning it and asking for things to change. This continues to show that our world is broken and we need Jesus to heal and protect and bring justice. We also need those who claim to follow Jesus to open their hearts and not respond in fear. It's a very hard thing to do, but it must be done.
Friday, October 30, 2015
Dear Fat People
I am the type of person who goes through waves of watching YouTube videos excessively and then not at all. I have recently found myself looking for more creators to follow as I have more "free" time at work (Shhh, our little secret). Recently I've found myself bored with my subscriptions and looking for new channels. While searching, I stumbled on a controversial video with a ton of response videos from some of my favorite YouTubers. Since I'd rather not give this video more views, I will only say what it was about: Being overweight.
Fat. Chubby. Heavy. Large. Plus-Size.
As a larger person, I've struggled with these labels and experienced the anxiety/fear of being picked on for most of my life. I did avoid a lot of unwanted attention from any potential bullies simply by blending in and erasing myself from anyone's radar. I do not, however, suggest this for anyone because not only do you erase yourself from the bully's mind but you also lose your own identity and uniqueness in the process.
So, as someone who struggles with weight and the insecurities/fears/doubts that come with it, this particular video was very painful to watch. The creator made jokes about fat people and claimed that she was using it to "motivate" fat people to get off their ass and lose weight. My heart broke. Instead of feeling encouraged or motivated I felt shitty, self-loathing, and angry. Thankfully I'm much stronger now than I was in high school (which is the age of a lot of YouTube viewers these days) because seeing a video like that would have wrecked me. The creator claimed it was a joke and meant to be sarcastic/funny but later defended it saying it was actually to help overweight people be healthier. *side eye* I don't see a single place in the entire video that could be motivating. Shame on her for even trying to say it was meant positively at all.
I wish I could be as strong and confident as the creator in the video below (Meghan Tonjes) in her response video. I'm not making a video to respond, but I do still want to take a stand and say this to that horrible YouTube creator: I may be a larger woman, but I am still a person. I matter regardless of my size. Your video was offensive and rude. I know you have defended it saying it was all for fun as well as motivating, but let me tell you this: IT WASN'T FUNNY. And the only thing it motivated me to do was write this blog, never watch another video you make, and instead support actual creators worth being on YouTube.
The creators below are some of my favorite voices on YouTube in terms of opinions, humor, and overall entertainment value of the content they regularly produce. Meghan is the first video and she has basically the same reaction that I had when she watched it. I cried with her and got frustrated with her...I wish we had more female voices out there to represent the large ladies and show the world what we can do. Watch below (note: R rated language is in both of the videos):
There are a bunch of other reaction videos out there, but this is by far one of my favorites. It's from Nicola Foti and his videos (found on SoundlyAwake) are some of the most hilarious and entertaining in my YouTube watchlist; this one is on point and needs to be shared in response to the video in addition to a bunch of other hateful videos out there:
Fat. Chubby. Heavy. Large. Plus-Size.
As a larger person, I've struggled with these labels and experienced the anxiety/fear of being picked on for most of my life. I did avoid a lot of unwanted attention from any potential bullies simply by blending in and erasing myself from anyone's radar. I do not, however, suggest this for anyone because not only do you erase yourself from the bully's mind but you also lose your own identity and uniqueness in the process.
So, as someone who struggles with weight and the insecurities/fears/doubts that come with it, this particular video was very painful to watch. The creator made jokes about fat people and claimed that she was using it to "motivate" fat people to get off their ass and lose weight. My heart broke. Instead of feeling encouraged or motivated I felt shitty, self-loathing, and angry. Thankfully I'm much stronger now than I was in high school (which is the age of a lot of YouTube viewers these days) because seeing a video like that would have wrecked me. The creator claimed it was a joke and meant to be sarcastic/funny but later defended it saying it was actually to help overweight people be healthier. *side eye* I don't see a single place in the entire video that could be motivating. Shame on her for even trying to say it was meant positively at all.
I wish I could be as strong and confident as the creator in the video below (Meghan Tonjes) in her response video. I'm not making a video to respond, but I do still want to take a stand and say this to that horrible YouTube creator: I may be a larger woman, but I am still a person. I matter regardless of my size. Your video was offensive and rude. I know you have defended it saying it was all for fun as well as motivating, but let me tell you this: IT WASN'T FUNNY. And the only thing it motivated me to do was write this blog, never watch another video you make, and instead support actual creators worth being on YouTube.
The creators below are some of my favorite voices on YouTube in terms of opinions, humor, and overall entertainment value of the content they regularly produce. Meghan is the first video and she has basically the same reaction that I had when she watched it. I cried with her and got frustrated with her...I wish we had more female voices out there to represent the large ladies and show the world what we can do. Watch below (note: R rated language is in both of the videos):
There are a bunch of other reaction videos out there, but this is by far one of my favorites. It's from Nicola Foti and his videos (found on SoundlyAwake) are some of the most hilarious and entertaining in my YouTube watchlist; this one is on point and needs to be shared in response to the video in addition to a bunch of other hateful videos out there:
Be kind to people and know everyone is a complex human being and living their own story.
I am a complex human being who is also heavy...but I am valuable and deserve to be treated as a person and not a joke. If you are reading this and you are struggling with your own self-worth, know this: You are Loved by God and you are a valuable person in society no matter what you look like. You are important and don't let anyone make you believe you are anything less than amazing.
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